stardust.

I knew
we two
to be heavenly bodies-
beings of  f.i.r.e.,
posed to inspire
awe,
to offer light
in the night
as stars.

I knew
you
to be the sun
sharing  h.e.a.t.,
making life sweet
for me,
and it burned
when I learned
what you are.

I know
now, the glow
is brightest
just before i.m.p.l.o.s.i.o.n.,
just before      e x p l o s i o n
just before the  [black hole]
destroys its neighbors
and labors
to leave the sky in scars.

why you should leave

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“I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move.” -Robert Louis Stevenson

 

You should leave your room because the relationships you have with your family, friends and roommates will always be more fulfilling than the relationship you have with your Netflix account.

You should leave your house because the fresh air and sunshine is good for you. So is getting caught in the rain- how else would you learn to take an umbrella?

You should leave your hometown or your city to see what amazing things and people are right around the corner. You’ll come to know that sometimes adventure is only half an hour away.

You should leave your state to discover exactly how beautiful that New York City skyline is, what the big deal is about that Chicago deep-dish pizza, and what they really mean when they talk about ‘southern hospitality.’

You should leave the country and learn that you, and your problems, are small in comparison to the size, wonder and beauty of the world. You’ll learn that those people halfway across the globe, speaking other languages and eating different foods, are the same as you in all of the ways that matter. You will change the way you see the world and the way you see yourself.

You should leave your work at the office so that you don’t make it your identity, and come to know, if you don’t already, that in the end life is not measured in paychecks or promotions.

You should leave your phone at home and find the peace that comes with uninterruption, the sunset that can’t be captured by your camera lens and the sounds of the live music in the air that blow your iPod out of the water.

You should leave your regret, your doubts and your inhibitions behind because they will never help you grow the way acceptance, belief and experience will.

You should leave your family and friends, if only for a little while, to find out how truly lucky you are to know them. Time spent apart will make the sound of their voice sweeter and the feeling of their embrace warmer. It will make the fights and the misunderstandings small and unimportant.

You should get out of here– be it on foot, bike, train, plane, boat or car. You should leave so you can discover other people, other places, other ways to see the world. You should go to learn who you are when you’re not surrounded by the familiar things you lean on and cling to.

You should leave so you can live.

go ahead- break their heart

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“The heart was made to be broken.” -Oscar Wilde

That guy from your art class. The girl who comes in every day for her coffee order. Go ahead.
The guy you met yesterday. That girl you’ve known your whole life. Go ahead.

Go ahead- start the conversation. Compliment their shirt, tell them their hair looks nice. Commiserate about the morning commute. Laugh.

Go ahead- make plans. See a movie, get dinner, have coffee, hang out. Get to really know each other. Be surprised by the things you both like, and don’t. Look forward to them. Have fun. Be happy.

Go ahead- fall harder than you intended. Be afraid, but do it anyway. Become incredibly and irrevocably important to each other. Share things you don’t share with many (or any) other people. Connect. Understand. Grow.

Go ahead- get comfortable. Memorize their pizza order and their favorite beer. Get addicted to their tv shows. Steal their Netflix password. Become genuine friends with their friends and learn to love those people as much as they do. Quit censoring yourself around them. Expect them there for the important and unimportant stuff.

Go ahead- fight. Get (a little) jealous when you’re supposed to. Be upset when they’re not paying attention or giving back. Call them out on their bullshit. Let them do the same for yours. Learn when to let it slide, and when you shouldn’t. And when you can’t.

Go ahead- try. Make the effort to keep it together, with everything you have. Do nice things for each other, and check yourself when you’re getting overly annoyed at the small stuff. Revisit the early times and the old jokes, the things that bonded you together. Take a deep breath.

Go ahead- admit it isn’t working. Talk it over with your friends, but make sure you make the decision yourself. Sit on it for a few days. Really think about what it means. Man/woman up, and choose.

Go ahead- break their heart. Recognize that if you’re in it for any reason other than love, you’re not doing them any favors. Loyalty, pity, fear of loss, jealousy- understand that these are not reasons to stay with them. Be honest. Don’t tell them you can still be friends if you can’t (hint: you probably can’t). Hold them when they cry, and leave when you have to.

Go ahead- miss them. Miss them even though you don’t think you have a right to. Don’t get mad when you see that they’re okay- you knew they would be eventually. Know that letting them go was the best thing you could have done for them and that someday, when they find out what you two were lacking, they’ll know it too.

Go ahead- try again. Learn from the last one. Don’t forget a single feeling, but don’t be too afraid when you feel it all again. Don’t feel guilty if it’s been three years, or three months, and don’t let that be the thing that stops you. If it seems worth it, give it a shot.

Go ahead. Life is for living- if you do it right, it’s gonna hurt. It’ll surprise you and knock you on your ass and make you indescribably happy and miserable. And if you do it right, it’ll be worth it.

So go ahead- text her. Screw that, give her a call. Tell him he’s funny. Agree to a date, and give it a whirl. You might end up never seeing her again. You might end up having to break his heart. But you might not.

Go ahead.

What I’m Learning in College

It’s only Tuesday and I’ve learned a lot already this week. Here are some things I didn’t know college would teach me.

  • We are so much more and so much less than we know
  • “Experiencing the entire gambit of human emotions is exhausting” – one of the greatest professors/men I have ever met
  • There’s an elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about. They prefer silence, but there will never be silence. Life is for noise. 
  • All of poetry is a message in a bottle
  • If you can’t laugh, you have the wrong attitude
  • Perspective is a powerful thing